As a young girl I was also a constant over achiever. I was the straight A, perfect attendance, student of the year type. I wanted to accomplish a great deal so I could leave home and have a better life. I also wanted to overachieve since I thought that this was the only way that I was worthy of being loved or respected. I often believed that I would be worthy of love only when I was perfect enough.

As a young girl I would hear things like if I was too smart then no man would love me. When I felt beautiful and I would wear feminine clothes I was often told that I wasn’t pretty enough since I wasn’t petite and that my butt was too big.  I was also taught subconsciously taught that it was bad to wear bright make-up of to be a sensual woman.   After such criticisms I became a tomboy who played competitive sports since I thought it would make me feel safer, and more successful.  I was subconsciously taught that women are not as strong or as valuable as men. I believed that if I became more masculine, more accomplished, and if I worked harder then I would be valued.

From that point on I constantly only focused on my achievements. My career, academics, working hard, and achieving more was my constant focus. I graduated with multiple Masters degrees  with several scientific publications in a time span of 5 years. I then  graduated from Eastern Virginia Medical School and soon after graduation I started practicing medicine in the field of Dermatology. I have practiced both Medical and Cosmetic Dermatology and while practicing I often would see a trend in my female patients. There were mainly two types of female patients that I would take care of and that I would constantly recognize myself in.  They were either women that would either be great at giving and taking care of everything and everyone else before they would ever think of caring for themselves or they were beautiful accomplished women who wanted to be more perfect.  Often I would look at these women in awe since they were so beautiful and these women would only see flaws and imperfections instead of honoring both their true beauty and their true value. These women were afraid if they were not perfect enough then they would not be loved or have joy in their lives.

I knew I needed to honor my unique beauty by honoring all aspects of myself. I then began to study joy and pleasure. I spent years and hundreds of hours studying, love, pleasure, sensuality, and sexuality. I knew I wanted to be more balanced and heal my psyche and the Divine femine in myself since I had suppressed her for so long. I began to study Divinity and the sacredness of women. I learned that the feminine psyche was just like an incision that I cut on my patients skin. I learned that as women we are intuitively designed to heal, especially with the right environment, the right medicine, the right mindset, and the right tools.  I soon desired to not only heal the physical body but to also heal the feminine soul and the feminine psyche! Once this passion was ignited… I then went on to obtain my PhD with a Doctorate of Divinity and Spiritual Philosophy with an Emphasis on the Divine Feminine. I began to study Mary Magdalene and how she was an iconic woman who was not afraid to stand in her passion, her purpose, and her beliefs. I studied the divine feminine in both Christianity and other world religions. I also studied  sacred sexuality since I wanted to heal that aspect of myself and I went on to study with some of the worlds leading sex, love, and relationship experts. I am so passionate about this topic that I am currently receiving a professional coaching certification by the world renowned Layla Martin and I am currently in the process of obtaining a 600 hour sex, love, and relationship professional certification.

This desire was based on the fact that as a young girl I was also subconsciously taught that my sexuality, and my desire for abundance and success were either frivolous, bad, or selfish. I had horrible visibility issues since any attention I received was criticism. I would often hear things like I am a prima donna or to get off of my high horse. While growing up I was never encouraged to be successful and the more successful I became and the more positive attention I received the more I would be rejected by my loved ones. Some examples are my parents did not show up on my college graduation day even when I was the first person in my family to receive a college education. I also had a parent walk out of the room when I was receiving the Paragon Award for moral and ethical excellence at Eastern Virginia Medical School.   These messages taught me to hide pieces of myself and to not fully shine my light since it wasn’t safe and I could be either rejected or criticized. The underlying message I received is don’t shine too brightly. Don’t be too visible, too confident, or too sexy. The message was don’t be too noticed, too opinionated, or too successful and that I was overall just too much!

The truth is once I discovered these deep wounds… I knew I needed to heal my family lineage. I realized that the issue wasn’t that I was too much, it was that I hadn’t found the container big enough for me. I had to learn  that the world is much bigger then the container of my biological childhood home. I realized that I needed to heal all aspects of myself and that I needed to fully honor and embody all dimensions of myself. Over time I began to go from a life of duty, self doubt, criticism, over working, and servitude, to learning how to be confident, successful, and self-loving. I learned to love all aspects of my humanity and my divinity.

I have learned how to go from a feeling of unworthiness (unless I was producing) to being a divine receiver. I have learned to shine my authentic self brightly. I became luminescent when I was no longer fearful of shining my own authentic and unique light. The truth is the more I wasn’t fragmented by hiding the sexual, joyful, pleasurable, sensual, playful, or powerful aspects of myself the more I became whole. As I became whole I became happier and wealthier. I also learned that my self worth was directly related to my abundance and that beauty and pleasure is a wealth mentality.

Once I honored my sacred sexuality and sensuality the opposite of what I was taught happened.  Before, standing in all aspects of myself including my sacred sexuality, men would hit on me in a slimey and derogatory way. Since embracing all of me and my sacred sexuality, men now come up to me in the grocery store but instead of being offensive they will approach me in an honorable way by just telling me I am beautiful and to have a great day and then they walk away. I have realized that when I am in my divine feminine power that is when men will be great servers and protectors and they will honor me in their divine masculine power.  I finally understood the quote that men are our reflections. I now have more kings and knights in my life then I could ever imagine.  It is my desire that every woman on earth is able to stand in her majesty. I desire to teach women that only once a woman is in her majesty and her divine feminine power, that men and the divine masculine can mirror her perfectly, nobly, and exquisitely.

I have created Majestic Beauty because I now realize that I have always been powerful and in my own right I have been a queen of my own destiny. I also realize that a queen is powerful but she can also be burdened by duty, obligation, tough choices, and over responsibility. I adore being a queen but I also adore balancing it in the world of the quaintrelle.  A quaintrelle is a Victorian word that means a woman who emphasizes a life of passion, expressed through personal style, leisurely pastimes, charm, and the cultivation of life’s pleasures. I have learned that once I embraced both the queen and the quaintrelle in me equally was the moment when I healed all aspects of my life. In that moment God and the universe gave me more gifts of abundance and divine experiences and my life is better then I could ever have imagined in my wildest dreams.